Well, it's 11:30 pm and I'm feeling funny! This isn't how I pictured it nor what I had hoped for, but here's what's happened the last couple of days and why I'm ok with it.
Wednesday I went in for my weekly prenatal checkup and was devastated when I hadn't dilated at all. The midwife called the hospital to schedule an induction for this weekend, and literally sounded like she was scheduling a hair appointment. So nonchalant. I broke down in tears, not sure about induction, overwhelmed by the unintentional pressure from family to have him this week, wondering if I was doing the right thing for our baby. She told me to keep the appointment but to think about it until then, and if I decided I wanted to wait a little longer that would be totally fine, they'd just do a non stress test that day instead of induction. So I'm scheduled for tomorrow Saturday at 4pm.
I have been asking for prayer and praying non stop since then that I would go into labor on my own. I trust that God already knows every detail of my birth story and I trust in Him. I just needed some sort of reassurance to keep the Saturday appt or to hold off until going into labor naturally.
This afternoon I had a "post date" appointment for fluid level testing and monitoring. When the RN started the ultrasound, she couldn't find any water (amniotic fluid) at all, only after searching for it around my uterus did she find the bare minimum amount. While she was looking she mentioned I may not be going home and instead be induced right then if there was no water left for the baby. After she found the fluid, she hooked me up to the monitor and said if he was moving well then I'd be fine to head home, especially since I already had an induction scheduled for tomorrow. The baby was very active and had a few periods of excitement (they want to see his heart rate spike a few times while I'm there) so she sent me home.
Knowing he is healthy but also running out of amniotic fluid was exactly what I needed to reassure me to keep the induction for tomorrow. Bennett has had a nice long time in there & now it's time for him to come out. I know a lot of people don't agree with being induced, but this is what I feel is right for me & my baby this time.
At first I was disappointed I won't have the experience of timing contractions, getting to call family and say "it's time!", frantically loading the car and leaving. But overall, I'm so thankful. We do live an hour from the hospital and now I am not worried about whether or not we'll make it in time. I'm thankful to know we're getting him out in a healthy timeline and that I wasn't induced too early. And like I said before, God has known our story the entire time and its my job to trust Him and his timing.
Hopefully I get some good rest tonight & I look forward to introducing our little guy to you all, very soon!! I appreciate your prayers for a healthy baby & delivery :)